The Other Side of Morgellons

"I'm just getting started"

Month: July, 2012

Clear Blue Sky Johns Herbal Treatment for Morgellons

I came across Clear Blue Sky Johns protocol and I want to post it here.  Very quickly let me tell you that I utilized many parts of this excellent advice that John gives and I believe in it.  His suggestions I believe are some of the most effective and important that you will find on the internet. why?  They helped me but more impressively both John and his wife escaped Morgellons and apparently when Johns mother in law contracted Morgellons she immediately adopted the protocol and remarkably was able to recover in just six months.

BEFORE YOU READ THIS I GUESS I SHOULD SAY A COUPLE OF THINGS. THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE. I AM MERELY POSTING SOME “THOUGHTS”.  AS FAR AS I KNOW IT IS STILL NOT ILLEGAL TO THINK AND I REALLY THINK THIS GUY THINKS WELL!

Also I want  to repeat a very simple but profound statement from John:  “DONT LET ANYONE TELL YOU THAT YOU CAN’T GET RID OF THIS”. Thank you so much Clear Blue Sky John.

From John:
I am posting this in the hope that it may help someone in their recovery from Morgellons, and Lyme if you also have that infection.

When my wife and I were sick with Lyme and Morgellons, we were not sure what bacteria, fungus, yeast, or fill in the _____, came first, so I decided to go for the mow ’em down approach with the most powerful herbs that we could buy.

The most important herbs, depending on degree of ‘herxing’ are:

Cat’s Claw, Teasel, Olive Leaf Extract, Seven Forest Herbal formulas for Spirochetes ,Triphala, and Sarsaparilla.

Also: 2 Kyolic Garlic formulas (Immune and Antioxidant), Pau d’Arco, Folic Acid, NAC(Cysteine), Ionic Silver, Oregano, and Grape Seed Extract.

Also Artemisinin if you suspect Babesia.

For Sanity: Aromatherapy: Menthol crystals diffused into bedroom & office- calming to nerves and whatever itches like hell.

Lifesaver: Kleen-em-Away (enzyme cleaner) or equivalent.

Each item has a purpose and some have several. Some are antibacterial, anti-fungal, and a dewormer. Others are for taking care of the die-off of bacteria, yeast, fungus, and worms and flukes if you have those.

We had neuro-Lyme symptoms to the extreme. About the only thing we didn’t lose was our sense of humor- although we mostly laughed at ourselves.

I feel like our present good health is due to attacking all infection and infestation at the same time- because they reinforce and sustain each other.

Knock out one and the others invite another.

Until the answers are revealed through research, if ever, of what attacks first and what follows, that riddle may not make a difference in how you treat your health problem- specifically Morgellons, which seems to encompass many infections and infestations.

As a gentle reminder Cat’s Claw helps over 200 known medical conditions, and for my wife and I it was as close to a silver bullet for the bad guys as you could find.

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keeping it real is real good news

recently i read a couple of books that have really sparked an interest in fermented foods for me. one is “wild fermentation” by sandor ellix katz.  the forward of his book is written by sally fallen.  sally fallen and mary g. enig phd authored “nourishing traditions”. both of these books are packed with recipes. they are more than cook books however. first of all in “wild fermentation” he speaks so lovingly of the fermenting process and the microbes involved. he is really passionate about the art of fermentation and you get a real sense of him  personally through out the book as he gives nice little stories here there.  in “wild fermentation” you will find loads of very clear recipes and tips on how  to ferment just about anything.   you can stick with with pickles, kraut and veg or get adventurous with some hard cider or sour dough bread.  he is very clear on saying there are no hard set rules. he inspires you to get fermenting.

in “nourishing traditions” the other book i just read i was so  impressed by how much information this book provides. again there are many great healthy real food recipes but the most impressive part fro me is the educated information in regards to our food and health she provides.  in the first part of the book there is a break own and some detailed information regarding fats in relationship to your health. prepare to be amazed and actually really happy.  you might just run out and buy a couple of pounds of organic butter and thank god the whole way to the store and back for giving us such a delicious and healthy food. some of you might be saying huh? butter? healthy?  read the book!  it is packed with surprising facts. it is amazingly researched and a joy to read mostly because you will begin to realize that many of the food we want to eat are actually good for us.  she is a strong supporter of good, real healthy food. that means non gmo and pesticide free.  she has a section in the back about economically eating organic; which i love because it’s ridiculous that organic eating often seems too expensive and unattainable. also if you thought you had to go straight raw or ultra vegan for health you might find this book illuminating to many of the falsities we have been led to believe.

some of you may have heard of dr winston price. he wrote a book in the 1930’s called “nutrition and physical degeneration”. it’s an excellent book and lends a lot of credence to the philosophy behind the paleo style diets but mostly points to how modern processed food truly is a source of a huge amount of modern disease.  in the book he writes about 14 different isolated cultures all over the planet that had unusually excellent physical, mental and dental health. he is very clear that where cultures untouched by white bread, white sugar and food we associate with a modern diet had exceedingly amazing health.  even if you are not interested in food and health the book is like a mini trip around the world in the 1930’s  touching down everywhere form the hebrides to figi.  dr winston price was a dentist so you will see a lot of emphasis on dental form and health.  there are many photos showing the health or lack thereof due to diet. i was really impressed when he compared siblings, where one had left the village to eat the modern diet and one had stayed eating the traditional fare. some of the traditional fare included large amounts of milk and cheese.  others had excellent health and lived almost mainly on moose meat!

if it sounds like i am knocking the raw food movement or veganism, i am not. i am merely pointing out that there is some impressive evidence that there is much more than meets the eye here in regards to modern diet and health. fruit and veg are only as good as the soil they are grown in as are the animals that eat them and we are only as good as what the animal we eat ate.

i read these books as i am a believer in eating many kinds of real food and  that includes meat, sea food and dairy. it also includes a large amount of fruit and veg (raw and cooked).  i wanted to understand the “french paradox” ( low heart disease and good health while eating meat and dairy and drinking wine). of course i went to these books knowing they were going to be talking about what i already believed  so i wasn’t a hard sell. i’m no dummy either though. i wanted facts. i wanted some history and i wanted some studies i wanted to not just hear what i believe (eating real clean food grown in solid soil and animals that eat them keeps health in check).  it seems too good and simple to be true that our modern diet might be causing disease in us and that good old fashioned unprocessed food with out toxins and gmo tampering could raise us to health.

this is exciting for all of us.   diet is a very personal thing. whether one eats raw, vegan or paleo, i think we can all agree. let’s keep it real. now i am going to go and eat a bowl of sliced banana with lovely full fat organic cream poured all over the top.

give me a “d”.. give me a “u”…give me a “h”…what’s that spell

so this is kind of funny.  i don’t  post on the forums but i do read them.  i came across my  yesterdays post (dear monsanto) on lyme busters. i like lyme busters because some of the people on there put some really clever stuff up. i was really flattered when i saw someone had put up my post from yesterday.  then i read a reply to the post which said:

“Dear ——–: I know you mean well by having written this, but unfortunately, this sort of rant will only look bad for us and will be ignored by Monsanto upon reading the first few sentences. Writing to them in a short, concise way (and with proper punctuation) would possibly have resulted in their actually reading it. We all feel the same as you re this issue, dear——–. I know you meant well.”

i must admit i found that comment annoying (note to self: tina, that’s why you stay off the forums). when i get annoyed these days i like to stop think and figure out why. usually it will have something to do with my own personal problems or something i need to work on. i don’t think that was the issue here though. what annoys me about comments like that is that..well first of all i do hope you all know that it was not “a letter” per se. it was what i would call more like a sarcastic piece of creative writing. i had to think to myself..wow..did no one get it? am i that far out of touch. i myself think it’s hilarious and it wasn’t meant for monsanto to read. as if mr monsanto and mr future are single individuals.  if i was going  to write a letter to send to a corporation i certainly wouldn’t have wasted my time writing to monsanto (like that’s going to make them up and stop.) and i would not have signed off “love, tina”. actually i just had a hilarious thought though… imagine a bunch of guys in suits sitting at a board meeting. imagine them reading that letter out loud and saying “ok boys, the girl has a point..she’s right we need to stop what we’re doing right now..all in favor…” aaahahahahahhaha…ha! i just made myself laugh out loud there. it’ a funny thought.

i like to think of yesterdays post as a “cheer” and so that kind of makes me a cheerleader. i am not much of a writer but i was a cheerleader in high school..i know scary huh. just to be fair i hated it and  also was the worst cheerleader ever. still bad cheerleading or not the, we must keep the morale up.

all right let me try and get closer to the real issue at hand. the reply above isn’t actually what bothered me but more it reminds me of something bigger.  the part in the comment saying “this sort of rant will only look bad for us”..my question is look bad to whom exactly? and why exactly would “we” look bad? it is corporate greed that looks bad. i will tell you what also looks bad…when you can’t tell the truth. seriously, even though it is not a  serious “letter” and i wrote it for all of US to read( for entertainment purposes) ..why could i have not sent that to monsanto if i wanted to. it is all the truth. why would i have to look professional and have proper grammar? after what i’ve been through and as sick as i was i am lucky i can even sit at a computer and type. after what i have been through i don’t give a rats ass about grammar. i have some some much bigger fish to fry (ok they might be little fish in my own little pond in my back yard)  a lot of you can relate when i say  “when you get that sick and you lose a lot of things you care about..well, the world looks different.

to be honest i feel kind of lazy for even picking mr. monsanto to be my antagonist in yesterdays rant. what an easy target.  there is so much wrong  going on all around us. it’s completely overwhelming. where do we start? for me i started with myself. thats what this blog is. it is a continuing letter to myself to help me start somewhere. to eat right. to stay current. to keep my sanity in an increasingly  insane world. to help pick up the piece’s of my life. it turns out that some of those pieces that i pick up for myself were other people pieces too. it as though i did my yard work and my tree is also the neighbors tree because it is right at the fence line. when i watered that tree i watered some else’s tree too. yes, i do make a lot of jokes. i have too. i have to remain humorous or else  i might get sucked into a dark place. i have to remain positive. so to the person that said “i know you meant well”. my reply is..thank you! and not  only did i mean well, I DID WELL! we are all doing well…and thats what it  is going to take…. a village.

so as we all know  the forums sometimes to do a good job slamming each other and often get off topic going back and forth keeping each other in line. sometimes very cruelly and sometimes passively aggressively like who ever it was that left the reply above (even though “i know you meant well”…. how’s that for passive aggressive). what is really sad is that morgellons disease research site is getting out of control. some people don’t post anymore because they can’t feel safe. thats real sad when you are dealing with morgellons. please  don’t get me wrong. i have seen incredible love and support on the forums. i have been  amazed at the beauty and kindness that some very sick people have given to others suffering. honestly without the forums i don’t know how a lot of us could have made it through the mental and physical pain that morgellons dishes out on a daily basis.

ok all you pit bulls and poodles, vegans and paleo dieters, morgies and lymies and even a few  unfunny people and nuts like me..we are all on the same side… now can you all yell that three more times! (i told you i was a lousy cheerleader!).

dear monsanto

dear monsanto (oh dear..)

i am sorry that you your business is happening in this time and space where it simply will not work.  you have tons of money and  there’s still time to disappear quietly in the night.  as it stands now you are on a fast track to the big house. at this point you could still feign ignorance. you could probably get away with saying “we had no idea..blah blah blah”.

look monsanto..here’s the deal..i was talking to my buddy, mr. future, he told me that if you keep up what you’re doing that he’s sees you in jail. the stoney lonesome. actually mr. futures exact words were  “federal prison for crimes against humanity.”  monsanto i shouldn’t have to remind you that you can always change your future (cause you know all about that, don’t you). at this time and point if you tucked your tail and ran, worse case scenario they might only  get you for plain ol’ manslaughter (you know accidental homicide thing)

why do you even wanna hang out? everyone hates you.  you know what i can’t figure out is with all that money you have did not one of you geniuses  consider hiring a pr firm? ok, i know you have one but honestly you need

to fire them because they are doing a crappy job. why do i know this. well, because everyone  hates you.

i saw you on Facebook and seems the positive comments you had were actually from your employees (that you pay).  there were a lot of negative comments from a  lot of people. why? well, because everyone hates you.

ok this might sound  superficial but you might want to think about changing your name too. honestly you’d  probably do better if you just went with straight “satan”.  the teenagers would love it.

oh monsanto, you have created some absolutely stellar products.  like  ddt, agent orange, dioxin and recombinant growth hormone.  that round up is sure some neato to stuff (and also the 130  or so  herbicide resistant “super weeds” you created).  super weed is a funny word. you should change your name to super weed  because apparently you JUST WONT GO AWAY. sort of like when

back in 1965 when you  illegally dumped thousands of tons of highly toxic waste in the united kingdom. you did that for 8 years.  when you pollute the ground water like that it JUST WONT GO AWAY.

from wickpedia:

……A UK government report shows that 67 chemicals, including Agent Orange derivatives, dioxins and PCBs exclusively made by Monsanto, are leaking from one unlined porous quarry that was not authorized to take chemical wastes. It emerged that the groundwater has been polluted since the 1970s.[80] The government was criticized for failing to publish information about the scale and exact nature of this contamination. According to the Environment Agency it could cost £100m to clean up the site in south Wales, called “one of the most contaminated” in the UK….

man you really screwed that place up didn’t you. maybe you really should consider changing your name and buying an island. people just keep suing you. it seems you are almost always involved in one high profile lawsuit or another.  you know where you went wrong..you sued all those farmers.  who doesn’t love a farmer and you sued something like 145 individual  farmers. call me crazy but thats bad p.r.!  on your website you said  “We help farmers grow yield sustainably so they can be successful”.  then why are you trying to send the farmers to jail and for what? saving seeds? you’re  freaking nuts. you don’t own those seeds, you never did and word on the street says the lady you stole them from (ms. mother nature) wants them back.  you really need to be careful who you piss off.  you have been around since 1901 (you sly super weed:)  and you have been polluting, suing and screwing the planet for about 111 years and making billions and billions of dollars doing so. so after all this time i guess you probably think we don’t notice.  or you can just pay a measly million here and a million there to shut the people up that you made sick. here’s the thing, while you have been busy concocting those freaky genetically modified plants and bugs a few people woke up. it’s true monsanto. the people are waking up in massive numbers and they don’t  like what they see but you don’t need silly me telling you that because you already know it.huh!  thats why you attached riders to both the 2012 Farm Bill and the 2013 Agriculture Appropriations Bill that would essentially force the federal government to approve GMOs at the request of biotechnology companies, and prohibit all safety reviews of GMOs from having any real impact on the GMO approval process.

ok monsanto. more soon. love, tina

  

master herbalist, stephen buhner answers question regarding morgellons

stephen buhner, well respected master herbalist and author of “healing lyme” answers question form morgellons sufferer

Herbs for Morgellon’s disease

Dear Stephen,
I am curious whether you have had experience treating Morgellon’s Disease with your Healing Lyme protocol. How would you advise someone with Morgellon’s to proceed? Thanks!

 

Stephen’s response:
Morgellon’s disease is very new, very complex, and somewhat controversial, and there are not any herbalists that I know of who are focused on treating it. If one does have the common symptoms associated with it I can suggest a couple of things:

 

1. For the sensation of crawling under the skin: Vitamin b-12, 5000 mcg sublingual daily. It probably will not stop the problem but it can often help.

2. For brain fog: Resveratrol, vincamine, huperzine A. Usually from inflammation in the brain or CNS, this will help lessen that and increase mental acuity as a result.

3. For fatigue: Eleutherococcus
In general, the deep fatigue comes from the body having to deal with a continuing infection; all its resources go there and not into a general feeling of vitality. Eleuthero will raise immune function and also increase energy levels. It will also help with depression.

4. Skin lesions: The skin lesions are problematical. This is always a difficult condition to treat, no matter what the cause. However, because of some of the aspects of the skin problems associated with Morgellons that research has shown, the use of the collagen protocol outlined in my Healing Lyme book (see bookstore) should help. Specifically: “Eighteen specimens, taken from a 57-year-old woman reveal bone, synovium and joint tissue having extensive degenerative fragmentation, roughening and bony formation and underlying extensive degeneration of the bone.” This seems to be common and the collagen protocol should help.

5. Fiber growth: the problems with the fiber growth are, well, really strange and though I have looked through some of the newer research on it, the reason why it is occurring is unknown. The collagen protocol should help strengthen the skin structure, the resveratrol should help with the inflammation. However until the underlying cause is determined it will be hard to treat the underlying cause. This pretty much throws things into the symptom treatment category until then. Since antibiotics do work to some extent with the condition, it does point to an underlying bacterial cause (working hypothesis). This means that increasing immune function should help. The fact that about half of the people with Morgellons (at least from one study I looked over) have lyme is interesting and stimulates the question as to whether or not it is related. Maybe.

The skin problems are, well, horrible. I have two suggestions besides those offered, both experimental.

1. Cryptolepis tincture: this is a remarkable antibacterial herb, perhaps the only systemic general herbal antibacterial of any strength. I suggest it for systemic staph that does not respond to antibiotics – it works very well. I also suggest it for babesia (not enough data yet to tell if it is reliable for this). You might consider trying it. Cryptolepis tincture is available from Woodland Essence (315.845.1515) in Cold Brook, New York.

2. The second suggestion appears in the article Eaten Alive published in theGuardian Unlimited on Tuesday, April 10, 2007. I have looked into this a bit and it sounds very promising. Not a cure but perhaps something that can help a great deal. It is an odd thing but I have had similar reports from people and have seen the healing involved and it is impressive. Whether it would help with this is unknown but if I had the condition I would try it without hesitation.

Stephen
 
link to stephen website for excellent herbal information or to buy any of his books:

Molkosan is Real Good Stuff

It was Hippocrates who first recognised the ability of whey to aid digestion and eliminate toxins. Molkosan is concentrated lacto-fermented whey.

This whey comes from swiss cheese, which is fermented at room temperature for a lot longer than most cheeses. That means that virtually all the lactose is converted to lactic acid.

This natural lactic acid is a natural antiseptic and prevents pathogenic germs from spreading on the skin and throughout the whole digestive tract.

By taking a tablespoon, or less, in a glass of  juice or water before meals, digestive enzymes are stimulated and secreted through the digestive tract, aiding immensely the process of digestion.

It stimulates the growth of healthy digestive tract flora, improving candida infections.

Molkosan also contains Vitamins B1, 2, 3, 5, 6, and 12. And, Folic acid, Vit A, Betacarotene, Vit C, calcium, potassium, magnesium, zinc, iron, chloride and oritic acid.

L (+) lactic acid provides an antiseptic action to inhibit bacterial and fungal infections. Molkosan presents no digestive problems for lactose-intolerant or lactose-sensitive people

In the production of Molkosan , a process involving lactobacillus bacteria creates a positive and relatively rare form of lactic acid, which has two main effects.

1. It makes it very difficult for unfriendly bacteria to gain a hold in the gut.
2. It creates an acidic environment in the large intestine, in which friendly bacteria thrive.

Once unfriendly bacteria have been discouraged and friendly bacteria are given the environment they like, digestion and metabolism improve, and energy levels increase.

You are likely to feel far more comfortable, with a marked reduction in symptoms such as bloating, excessive wind, and constipation .

Seriously if you are feeling you might have something fungal going on inside or on your skin..you might want to try this out. Remember lactic acid is lethal to fungus.

Some other thoughts…I am a huge fan of this stuff. I can hardly say enough about it. When I set out to write this post I really wanted to convince anyone with morgellons to give it go. Why? Because it works and it’s cheap.  Here is the best thing though, it is “broad spectrum”.   I don’t know who in the morgellons community said “the battle in morgellons will be won in the gut”.  Who ever said that seems to be right.  Mulkosan got me feeling better.  The insides start moving better.  You will get feeling healthy faster if you can stay very regular. When I got that whole “process” moving freely  I was able to make really good progress.  As usual I have left so much out here.  I want to just say this..we are all hearing we need to support our immune systems.  Your immune system is your best friend in the whole world…..better than your granny or your even your dog. It is saving your life on a daily basis in every second of every breath you take. Support it.  Whey is an excellent immune supporter.

All right all right ….last words.. Mulkosan is excellent for topical application. Use it for  insect bites, fungal skin infections etc.  It is also an excellent starter for getting your own fermented food going like cabbage and enzymes. I wish I was a better writer and I could gather all the words and proof up for you. I wish I could tell you better what wonderful things it has done for me. I wish i could come to your house right now and force feed you a bit of Mulkosan in the morning and the night…..spritz this stuff on your itchy skin. You can dilute wiht water 1 to 1 to start a little lactic acid peel for your scars (I know you have them!). It really softens the scars and if you are in that stage where you have the plaque feeling skin..well just let me say this..it really works. It’s inexpensive and oh…it’s organic too.  You can take forever.  It’s good for you.  it works.

OK I’ll stop now..well in a second. Any of you out there that decide to try Mulkosan will you do us all the favor of posting your feelings here as comments. I  bet you find you love it.  If my house were burning down  I would grab the dog and also the bottle of Mulkosan that is always right out in front. it is out there because I take it all the time. It sits way out in front of all my various supplements and herbs. It’s one of the top things to helped me feel better from morgellons and it is the one thing that I will always use.  I don’t take  a lot of the stuff I used to get better but I always take Mulkosan.

If you live in Europe you can get this at any health food store. In America you will have to order it online. I am sorry  that I can not get my links to work lately and also the crazy spacing. I  am just going to leave it rather than get frustrated. Try to cut and paste.

Here’s a link to amazon for 6.5 ounces for less than 9 dollars http://www.amazon.com/Bioforce-USA-Molkosan-Liquid-6-8/dp/B000UVXG5K/ref=pd_sim_sbs_hpc_3

Also some other info on the manufactures site: http://www.bioforceusa.com/avogel-world/stories-products/molkosan.php

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real food summit

 check this out. sean croxtons (underground wellness)  “real food summit” is going on right now and it’s free. i just finished listening to joel salatin talk about real food agriculture and i am in the middle of chris kressner talk about the importance of fish (and a whole lot more).  all in all there will be nine experts talking about my fav. subject “real food”.  

   i could never explain to you as well as these guys are explaining to me what these foods have to do with our health or lack there of it.  you will want to hear this for yourself.  real good information .link here: (if link does not work please cut and paste

http://realfoodsummit.com/chris-kresser/

klinghart interview

when i discovered dr dietrich klinghart my healing journey took a whole new direction.  he is a special soul with a nature that comforts. when he speaks about human illness you will come away uplifted and less afraid.

in the link below you can hear him interviewed by dr mercola. this is not a brand new interview. some of you may have heard it.  i have listened to this particular interview several times and i still want to listen again.  i especially want  to draw attention to a statement he makes very early in the interview where he says..

“…the new definition of the new lyme disease that means…it’s an illness transferred by insects…please hear me now we are not calling it anymore tick born disease because we know mosquitos can carry lyme disease and many other serious infections we know spiders fleas and mites can carry these illnesses.  to limit it to tick born illness is too narrow of focus…”  dr dietrich klinghart

hear entire interview here:

i am talking about bigger pictures

if you don’t have morgellons  i am talking to you.

if you don’t have lyme disease i am talking to you.

if you are sick i am talking to you too.

i am talking about bigger pictures. i am talking abut taking yourself out of the picture. i am talking about turning around and looking back at that picture and i asking you what you see.

 

“this never had to happen….we could have stopped this”

if you are not sick i am talking to you.

Independence Day

I am feeling especially free today.  Today, July 4th 2012 marks one solid year of my ” plaque skin” being gone.  It has been 19 months since my last lesion / cyst went away ( the “big one” over my right eye). Just before that  in November 2010 was my very last emergency room visit / hospitalization (when they surgically removed the cysts off my hip).  It is interesting to note that  this was my worst skin manifestation ever and also my second to last in this whole Morgellons business of healing. I was thrilled when they cut that thing out of me.  I actually was crying when they wheeled me to the surgery (tears of joy). I had tears  not just because I was in  serious pain and anticipating it soon would be over but I was also feeling so grateful that I  was finally being treated like a decent human being. When the hospital attendant saw I was crying a bit he asked me if i was ok. I said pretty adamantly “I’m awesome!”.

The last of my symptoms like the fatigue, neurological symptoms,  whistling in my ears, tooth pain,muscle pain, Gi  issues and sinus and respiratory issue had been dwindling since even before my skin started to heal. They would go away then flare then go away. They really were the last to leave  (they were the first to come though). These non skin symptoms flared to an all-time high last Nov. 2011 at the start of my lyme treatment (I am working on a separate post covering my lyme treatment).  They came back fast and hard  (especially my neuro symptoms) for about a month then waxed and waned for a couple of months.  By january 1st 2012 the worst  and even the non worst of everything was over. Today I can officially and gratefully report 7 months of complete recovery (symptom free). I just realized I am grinning right now. Sometimes when I revisit aspects of my recovery I shed a tear or two. So the fact that I can smile today tells me I am digesting the trauma better.

You might notice I talk  about the trauma aspect of morgellons a lot. For me it was the worst symptom (is trauma a symptom??).  It was the most painful part and the most difficult to overcome. I am working on it though.

Note:  I post aspects of my recovery,  time frames etc, for those of you that are still in the heat of the worst of morgellons and might be finding that hope is hard to find or hope is hard to hold.   If you wake up one day and believe you have lost hope I am here to tell you that you have not. You have only misplaced it and will find it again. I know you have not lost hope or else you would not be reading this.